The freedom of just donking an axe throwing season.

Well, I won't say I planned it this way, but here we are.

Last week was the first of the newest Wednesday league at Meduseld Meadery. A time of possibility. Of renewed opportunity and, perhaps even, a chance to have a season unmarred by mistakes and missed clutches (at lease, fewer missed clutches).

But as the matches went on, I went ahead and donked it all up. Like, real good. Point in fact, I think I did worse in the first week than I have since the very first league I ever signed up for. Let's look at the tape:

An axe league season: immediate donkage.

So like. So.

Like.

There are a few reasons for this lack of performance. I don't wanna belabor them, so I'll start with a bulleted list:

• I didn't really feel like throwing, in general. Life is busy and on fire, so doing the axe throwing felt, I dunno, like it was the wrong thing to do, at the moment. My head wasn't in it.

• Our Wednesday league is full of really, really good throwers. I'm not always one of them.

• I haven't practiced at all outside of league.

And I mean - yeah, it's the first week. There is time-a-plenty to start winning matches and clean up my record/league. But there's also something else. Some...well, let's be honest about it: some great pressure that's been lifted this first week.

Where to go from here: a donking introspection

I'm no longer aiming for perfection. And that leaves two other obvious options.

Vengeance.

Or fun.

And while vengeance certainly feels more justified (a scorched earth kinda idea where I absolutely crush the rest of the league and leave only broken axes (and hearts?) in my wake), I'm really too tired to keep up that sorta blood pressure. So I'm choosing this league, dear reader, as a fun league. I'm releasing myself from the obligation of achievement and, instead, focusing on the amount of enjoyment I can squeeze from the supple fruit that is Lancaster's murder league.

"But Badger," I hear you say, throat full of Pop Tart and beermosa, "What do you mean? Achievement is fun. Winning is fun!"

And you're right. Well put, dear reader! But it's not always fun. Point in fact, for throwers like me who, you know, aren't really all that great at throwing, tying "fun" to winning or accomplishment can really set one down a dark path. Well okay, that's kinda dramatic: it can set one down a path of unnecessary frustration, more like.

I've done that already this year - I got all up in my braincase, felt miserable, tried to get better, didn't, and then donked up the end-of-league tourney because I had built a bunch of stress up during the entire league. I didn't like it, and I didn't feel any better a thrower for it.

The freedom of donk

So, I'm making a decision. I'm drawing a little sawdust line in the lane: This league, I'm just going to focus on having good-time fun. I'm gonna do my level-best to take some of the pressure off myself when it comes to averages or score. I'm just gonna see it for what it is: a beer league sport that gets me out of my house and around a bunch of lovely, fun people.

Because, I mean, let's be honest with eachother, here. You know me, more or less. You know whatever my meagre contributions are to this sport, they have almost nothing to do with how well I throw. So why am I putting so much grump in myself every time I mess up doing that thing? Hell, I'm just paying to get grumpy. I can do that for free, if I really want it.

I've decided to see my donkage as a gift for this season. Because it happened so early, I get to spend the next 6 weeks just having a good time. Hanging out. Telling jokes and spending time with a truly excellent group of amazing throwers. Man-o-days, that sounds nice.