The Axe Thrower's Perfected Diet: The Jester and the Banana.

When humankind looks back at its greatest leaps forward, certain names shine bright: Edison giving us the lightbulb, Curie unlocking the secrets of radiation, the Wright brothers teaching us to fly. And then, in the humid, high-pressure crucible of the Pacific Region’s axe-throwing tournaments, came another visionary - Jason “Jester” Howell. With nothing more than a small bunch of bananas and a keen understanding of potassium-powered endurance, Jester changed the game. In the years since, his quiet act of fruity foresight has rippled through the lanes, inspiring throwers everywhere to peel, eat, and throw with renewed vigour. 

Australia’s Banana-man 

He may not have invented the Banana, he may not even have been the first to eat one at an Axe tournament, but as one of the most visible, successful, and supportive people in the Pacific Region, Jason (Jester) Howell is most definitely an influencer in our sport. Every victory, every classy loss (few as they may be), every “attagirl” or “way to go” called from behind the lanes secured his place in our hearts as a good model to emulate. Sticking to his guns with a 2 handed big-axe throw as the trends have come and gone, 1 handed, 2 handed, no-handed, underarm, between the legs…you name it we tried it, but without a shadow of a doubt and with few exceptions, the Region is settling back down to the Jester-esque 2 handed big-axe, such is his influence. 

The times they are a changing 

So it has been with Bananas. Not that long ago we were a lollies and junk food crowd. The distracting sound of hands rummaging through the wrinkly packaging of brightly coloured sugary sweet treats the typical background noise in our venues. As the crowd trended from Party Mix, to Maltesers, to Killer Pythons. Through the Gen-Y sour-patch patch right on to the Deli meat episode of 2024 (we don’t talk about that), Jester stood firm, silently defiant, his simple yet effective campaign a-peeling to our better senses. 

It happened slowly at first, the early adopters facing some derision for being “Jester wannabes”. Folks would sneak into dark corners or hang out with the smokers trying to pass their Bananas off as weirdly shaped vapes. But the tide was turning, and soon there were more people willing to brave the scorn and laughter for that sweet, sweet hit of potassium. With it’s gut friendly smooth texture, it’s low GI energy release, it’s silent packaging, this simple boomerang-shaped delicacy was slipping into the zeitgeist one benefit at a time, turning things upside down, in the land down under.  

Fruit for thought 

The final push into mainstream uptake for our saffron scimitars was a rumour doing the rounds they could possibly have a performance enhancing quality. Statisticians combed through years of Axescores data, confirming what had started as a mere rumour; There was a significant correlation between Banana consumption rates, and improved average scores at Pacific Region tournaments. (see graph attached)  

Now the tide has turned, the dam wall has burst, the genie is out of the bottle, and the Banana has fallen far from the tree. You can’t turn in any direction at a Pacific Region Tournament without the floppy flaxen skin of the fair finger fruit philandering forlornly at you. Local grocers are perplexed at the random rushes they get, not yet making the connection between our obscure sport and their unpredictable shortages. Venue organisers are having to come up with specific solutions for the peels; I hear Matt and Chloe at Battle Axe Wollongong are considering a dedicated bin for them next year.  

As a trend, it shows all the hallmarks of becoming a staple of the Sport in this country. Without a doubt the highest accolade for any aspiring influencer. I stop by to interview the great (if modest) man about this accomplishment and ask him a bunch of questions. 

What first got you onto bananas mate, was there a life shaping event or have you always been a bit fruity? 

That's a good question. I've always been a fan of banoffee, so I guess I’ve always been partial to that Banana flavour. As far as life events go, there is a bit of a story there as it happens. My wife and I were traveling for our honeymoon, and we were in Burma at the time Myanmar now. We’re on a bus trip going from one end to another I can’t remember place names, but we’re basically in the middle of nowhere. We stopped in this random pit stop and there was nothing there except a few people off the side of the road cooking some random meat out in the open, I had no idea what it was, kind of looked like I don’t know what, maybe goat, or pieces of rat. I took one look at the set up, the guys cooking, and it was a quick “Nope. Not going to go there.” It just had food poisoning written all over it. 

Branching Out 

So I found this random stall, with a lady selling fruit, and let’s just say there was something of a language barrier. I just wanted a few bananas, and she was adamant, she wanted me to take the whole lot, like there was virtually a branch of these bananas just sitting there on the table. I was trying to gesture to her, coming up with my own sign language, you know, just a couple, just this many please, must have looked hilarious to anyone seeing us. She was like, “no, no, you need to take the whole lot.” 

I’m there saying, “I got to get back on the bus.”, But she’s not backing down. At this point I’m just so hungry. I knew I didn't want to take my chances with the street meat, and there was just nothing else, no Oreos, packets of biscuits or chips, anything. So reluctantly I gave her whatever the money was in the local currency and took the bananas, if you can picture that in the fields of Myanmar, dirt road in the middle of the back country, this random skinny white guy, virtually half a tree draped over his shoulder, walking along the road.” 

I’m back at the bus, with all the locals rocking up, everyone gets back on giving me funny looks. I’m holding half a banana tree and the wife goes, “what are you doing?”  

All I could say was “This is all I could find from the markets.”  

Unfortunately, she didn't get a picture, but still to this day she's always. “Remember that time…?”  I don't know if that set the tone, my connection to Bananas or what but that certainly sticks in my mind? 

I thought you were going to say ‘still to this day…’ you're working your way through that branch!’ 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  

Yeah just about. 

Have you noticed at tournaments more people starting to bring bananas in? 

Yeah, I may have noticed, over time that they're around more. More now than ever. I remember people coming up to me in the past looking a bit sheepish, and whispering, “hey man, have you got a spare banana?” 

You were becoming a dealer? 

Yeah it was like that. It's like, what do you got, Cavendish, Lady Finger…? 

And I’m like “It's okay, back up, guys, Woolworths is just around the corner, pretty sure they haven’t run out.” 

Is it just tournaments or…? How much are they a part of your everyday life as well? 

To be fair they do feature a fair bit if I’m honest. My wife, when I go shopping, she'll sometimes ask “how many bananas do you really need?”  

“Well, I need at least two to three per night for axe throwing, so there's nine, Okay. And then for work I'll have like my muesli and my Chia pudding in the morning, blah blah blah. And it'll always have berries and it'll always have the token banana. There's five for the week. 

Yeah, so what then, fourteen already. Before you banana on the weekend. 

Maybe go a little cheeky banoffee for a dessert, like on an axe night. Coz by the time I get home, after a long and physical day at work, then straight out to axe throwing, honestly mate I just can't be arsed some nights.  

Wait a minute, you talking fresh banoffee? You talking homemade banoff? 

No, I do homemade banoffee, but It's a cheat’s version. 

Have you been holding out on us? When are we going to see this come out to a tournament Jay? 

This is, just a little home one. When I'm at home being naughty in my ugg boots and trackies. When I'm just being ‘Home Jay’ 

Ok we are definitely going to circle back to this, don’t think you’ve gotten away with keeping this secret from the community. 

So you are seen as a role model, and a player to aspire to. You’re one of the OG crew throwing since day one at St Peters, currently the top ranked thrower in the region and in the top 10 Globally, but you come across as one of the most down to earth, humble and supportive guys in the game. Can I ask do you enjoy the limelight, being put up on a pedestal? 

I've never been a fan of the limelight. I don't really see myself as anyone special. Maybe I've just been doing it longer, so that's why I've got those achievements. It feels weird. I mean, sure, Tyler—he’s won so much, he was always an inspiration to me. I lost to him a lot, and it was like, either get used to it or get better. So I got better. The first time I beat him, that was huge for me. Now we all push each other, and that’s the beauty of it. 

If I can inspire someone, if people see me as an influential figure, it just is what it is. Bryce did that interview with Kane from Newcastle for “Behind the clutch”, asking about who he looks up to, who are his influencers, and Kane was like, “Yeah, I met Jester at Battle Axe,” you know and “I’ve seen him on the YouTube streams.” That honestly feels humbling, man, just hearing your name thrown around. I’m sure people are sick of it by now after all these years. 

Oh my God man you have NO idea, anyway… 

One last question and this is the big one; Like I said I’m not letting you off the hook with keeping that homemade Banoffee recipe a secret. Would you like to take us out today with your recipe for “Home Jay Banoffee?” 

Ok Badger audience, gather round papa Jay is gonna lay some wisdom on ya, this will change your life. 

Home Jay Homemade Banoffee Recipe 

• You get the vanilla ice cream out, the nice vanilla ice cream, scoops in a bowl 

• Crush any biscuit over there to get that textural crunch. Even if you've got Tim Tams, hey, them bad boys will do, ginger snap, anything. You get a little different flavour contrast, but you get that texture.  

• Bananas. Of course, gotta have bananas. You've got to cut them up, get them all over there. (Jester getting visibly excited and I think even starting to drool at this point)  

• Biscoff spread, my God, shut up and have my baby. so you get a little scoop. Couple of scoops who am I kidding? Heat it up the microwave  

• Take that melted pot of gold and just pour yourself a little biscoff drizzle over the top.  

• And if you want to get really decadent, you can get a little extra shaving of some chocolate. 

  
  

Jester and I are in talks with Maniax to have a stall set up at APATC selling bowls of these over the weekend, so this is all trademarked, don’t even come at us. 

Australian bana...er...Badger, signing off.