AALOTO Broken Calculators

Life is full of assumptions; it needs to be for us to function. Assumptions are just things we believe without having vetted them thoroughly. If we had to check, judge, verify, and evaluate every piece of information coming at us every day, we’d hardly ever make it out the front door, much less navigate the wider world. Mostly they serve us well and, if they don’t - if evidence proves them wrong or not useful - we change them.

This happens all the time, mostly subconsciously. Some wrong assumptions dodge the self-correction phase though and can go on for years unchecked. When we are finally forced to face and question them it can be a bit jarring. Other times when the assumption is about something relatively trivial the process can be much more entertaining. Unchecked childhood assumptions are a gold mine of humorous future revelations.

For instance, I don’t want to admit how old I was when I finally thought about it long enough to realise chicken eggs didn’t come out a hen’s butt, it would of course come out it’s lady parts. (Chick-Fil-A Vijay-jay?…moving on). 

Needless to say, I’m even less keen to talk about how long it took for me to find out what a cloaca was, and that now I’m not sure when I was right and when I was wrong, or if I’m still neither and both. 

AALOTO Set-Up 

I started Axe Throwing just after Prem Rules came into effect. My experience would have been the same as all yours (barring the OG crew of course) there’s no real induction into its history or lore, just a rundown of the rules and a basic safety guide explaining the difference between the sharp and blunt bits on an Axe. I picked things up as I went, asked questions when I had built up the courage, and just pieced together the rest over time.  

AALOTO where is this going? 

Now if you’re paying attention you will see a link between these opening paragraphs; without being guided through the Axe Onboarding there is a lot of room left to make assumptions. Like, for instance, that all the terminology I was hearing in venue was official and universal to the IATF world. Well, my friends, I’m here to tell you I was Yesterday years old when I had that particular rug pulled out from under me, in the most delightful manner.  

I was listening to the AALOTO podcast, with Adeline giving a rundown of her experience at the UK open, when she expressed with some mirth her confusion about the Europeans referring to Prem 81’s as “Broken Calculators”. The full brains trust of the show couldn’t figure out the meaning behind this cryptic phrase, and a call was put out for people to send in their explanations.

So by now I’m sure they, and many more in the US, are aware what it means (I’m coming to that part, patience Iago, patience). But what I’m willing to bet (or at least am hoping is right) is no-one has revealed from where and whence it came to be.  

If that sounds like something you’d like to hear about, strap yourselves in, I’ve arranged a tour guide to take us back on a voyage through time and space, to witness the birth of the “Broken Calculator”. 

AALOTO Introduction 

It was only ever going to be a matter of time before I needed to talk about our guest today. Any conversation about Axe Throwing in the Pacific Region was going to include a chapter on Troy (Showpony) Evans. Joining the St Peters Maniax venue (the spiritual home of Axe Throwing in Australia) in 2018 - a seminal time in its growth - just 3 years since its opening. Starting out as a casual, moving up from host & axe coach to venue manager, and eventually in 2022 the national league coordinator. 

Moving from there he helped set up 2 more Axe Venues, before enjoying an extended tenure in Lumberpunks Melbourne. Now back in Sydney and between Axe Venues for the time being, his essence is a permanent part of our Region’s DNA. He has coached people to, or personally achieved, some of the biggest highlights we’ve witnessed. Including the World’s first Unicorn (4 x Prem 81’s in a single league night) and, I recently discovered, adding to Axe Throwing community’s vocabulary.  

Almost as soon as Adeline’s comments made me aware “Broken Calculator” (BC) wasn’t a universal IATF term, I reached out to the Australian community and asked everyone if they were aware of the phrase, and where they thought it came from. I was quickly put onto Troy who had, it seemed, coined the term early in his time at St Peters. 

AALOTO Broken History 

“The year was 2019, I can’t remember exactly who it was but I was scoring a playoff match and a player hit three 27’s in a row and got a little upset that it didn’t count. In an effort to cheer them up I simply stated, “neither does a broken calculator”, a crap joke to be sure, but they laughed.” 

“Hence the phrase was born, but the real meaning came a little later.” 

“Shortly after someone asked me what it meant. As it was just an impulsive joke it didn’t really have meaning. We began workshopping it for fun, and came up with the notion it should be an acknowledgement that you CAN (and did) hit an 81, you just happened to do it in the finals, or during a tournament.” 

“We established some ground rules, it could only happen in a match format with more than 3 rounds (Where 81’s don’t count), and the thrower had to achieve 3 consecutive rounds of 27 with no breaks in between.” 

“BC essentially became ‘You know you can do it, you’ve already done it, now just do it when it counts.” 

“It spread across St Peters, people were calling any 81s in the finals Broken Calculators. We even had the occasional double BC, where both players in the same match hit 81s at the same time. With the introduction of Prem rules and Big Axe leagues, the inevitable prem and Big Axe BC’s followed close behind.” 

“It became a thing here in Sydney, over time migrating to Wollongong, and Newcastle. Then I assume as Connor (C-Man, aka the UK Axe Badger Correspondent) Hugginson spent time in Sydney, it probably made its way to the UK with him upon his return.” 

AALOTO nope

What Troy didn’t (couldn’t) know at that point was I had made the same assumption, and had already reached out to C-Man for comment.  

“It’s totally possible it was I who spread the word however I was also out of the UK scene for a year which is like 5 Axe Throwing years. I think it was already a thing over here.” 

While Connor may still have played a hand in reinforcing this axe-iom’s migratory patterns, the phrase had seemingly beaten him back to the white shores of Briny Ol England. It seemed the rabbit hole down which I had ventured, was deeper and more convoluted than I had assumed. Truly since the start of this adventure, assumptions had let me down at every turn. Maybe this wasn’t even a rabbit hole I was in, Oh god, was I stuck in some metaphorical Cloaca? 

AALOTO Ewww let’s move on 

I had to keep pushing through, was there a way to chase down at least the rough movement of this Ocean-hopping trans-hemispherical phenomenon? So far, I knew it:  

• started in Australia in 2019  

• then pops up in the UK by 2025.  

Could we narrow down when it arrived in the UK, who can recall the oldest reference to it there? I had an ally, a man on the ground, C-Man had connections from Exeter to Norwich, Manchester to Bristol. I tasked him to pound the virtual pavement, beat the digital bush, and see what came flying out. 

So plugged in to the UK network is this guy, that he had something for me later that day.  

“Carl Howe reports hearing it in Boston back in 2021.”  

AALOTO What? 

Boston!? I had not anticipated Boston, nor for that matter any of the United States. The plot thickens. Ok once more to the corkboard, red string in hand; what did we have?  

• Coined by Showpony in Sydney 2019,  

• it takes a couple of years to spread across the state and then the country, 

• In fact while it’s still crossing state borders at home, another tendril starts to spread to other shores. It gets to the UK somewhere in the past 2 – 3 years,  

• before that, it shows up in Massachusetts somehow.  

  
  

It’s tempting to assume a direct route from somewhere in Oz to MA but, in reality, it could have been via other states, or maybe a comment made by someone at IATC at some all-night shoey sesh. I’ve got to chase down the leads I have. Carl Howe; which event, when did it happen, who was he speaking to? 

If I was going to crack this guy I had to know more about him, where were the pressure points? Were there skeletons in the closet? Let’s see:  

• owner of Valhalla North Throwing in the UK since 2019,  

• started throwing competitively in 2021,  

• has won various leagues and tournaments since then,  

• won the Laface of the community award at this year's IATC.  

  
  

So, a squeaky clean record apparently, maybe a little too clean? A little more digging turned up a rather compromising picture of him and his special friend / owner of 81 Axes; Goose, in flagrante delicto. This was hot stuff indeed, Carl was a married man, he wouldn’t want this bad boy getting out. 

I invited him into my messenger interrogation room, shining a light in his face, I was going to play some good cop / bad cop, but remembered I was on my own and that just wasn’t going to work. Time to play my ace card then, the photo.  

“Tell me what you know, or the world sees this private moment between you and Goose!”  

Carl just laughed, “I’m not sure there are many people left in the Axe Throwing community who haven’t seen that photo, but by all means go for it!” 

Ok change of tack, let’s just ask what he remembers, maybe throw in a ‘Please’? 

“So I might have been incorrect when I told Connor that I'd heard it in Boston (although I might have, but my memory is terrible). I do also remember an Aussie commenting on an old Facebook post of mine about winning regionals in 2022 (so around the same time frame) and using that term 'broken calculator'. I asked what it meant, and they explained it. It could have been that, that started it but I’m 90% certain I also heard it in Boston... I’m gonna reach out to some folks to check! I'll report back!” 

AALOTO Introspection 

The investigation was gaining speed, with more resources being brought to bear, it felt like I was due a big break any day now. I spare a second for contemplation back in my PI office, gazing in the middle distance between my desk and the dirty trench coat hanging on the stand in the corner. ‘A Facebook post!’ I’d done it again, assumed the phrase must have travelled physically, when it’s obvious the quicker and easier path was virtual.  

‘Come on Ryodhai, you’re slipping, get your head in the game!’ 

AALOTO Intrigue 

I waited to hear back from Carl, but he’d gone silent; either he was deep undercover, or his investigations had ruffled too many feathers. Had I pushed too hard for answers, was I responsible for a good man’s ‘disappearance’? Who had he run afoul of? Who had a dog in this game, with the reach to silence Carl?  

Did the IATF want to keep axe related naming rights to themselves? Was this story a potential roadmap for future attempts to add to our sports vocabulary?  

Was Joey the Hat (a Mob name if I’ve ever heard one) trying to limit the number of challenge coins to the current haul? Did he think this story could further promote the term’s adoption and therein increase the call for an official coin shaped recognition of the feat?  

Was Big-Calculator involved? Was the Casio / Texas Instruments cartel desperate to stop all this talk of their bread and butter Show Pony being broken?  

Wait … “Show Pony”? That was Troy’s throwing name!! Had I done it? Had I finally connected all the dots, and broken the case?  

AALOTTO Decaf in my future 

No. All I’ve managed to do is tie myself to the wall in a tangle of red string, and coffee-fueled, sleep deprived madness.  

Maybe how BC crossed the globe couldn’t be known for sure. Maybe it wasn’t even important? It was a throw away line, a joke to cheer someone up. The fact that it didn’t just stop at that is the story. As a community those around it refused to let it go. There was a sense that there Should be a term for that accomplishment. “Hell you Did achieve a big thing, it Is a milestone worth recognition.” The truth of that sentiment is what gave it wings, what sent it flying around the Axe Throwing world.  

AALOTTO last thoughts  

I know a couple of the best people in this sport who, between them, have an impressive collection of league and tournament hardware I will likely never get my hands on. Both of them have and treasure, unofficial trinkets to mark their first “Broken Calculators”. In a sport where arguably we don’t have enough “on the way” milestones to celebrate and help uplift throwers stuck on an achievement plateau, maybe more BC’s are needed, regardless of how or where they come about.